This reality that I am moving into is hard some days. Some days this house seems so quiet, regardless of how much I have to do. Some days I miss the sound of laughter, teasing, and come backs. Sometimes my heart is a little lonely, and this house seems much more spacious than it is.
But last week I received the gift of my family being together for three beautiful days.
I feel the disclaimer goes here, so bear with me. I know that some are farther away from their family. I know that if this was ten years ago I wouldn't have Skype or Facebook which keeps me in contact with my loved ones both near and far. I get that this life could be much much harder, and I'm actually quite content where I am right now, even if I'm still figuring it out. But my heart... it was full to overflowing for three beautiful days.
I have pictures of people together, laughter which rings in my ears, and time which practically stood still. Was it perfect? Nothing is, and thankfully I let go of the expectations of perfection. But I stood in a group with Capt, two boys, and a girl and followed them wherever they wanted to go.
This weekend I will see one boy again, and next weekend I am sure I will Skype the other two. They are all doing as they should, living their lives and being amazing people. Learning much on many fronts, and stepping into their own present. And I couldn't be more thrilled for or more proud of any of them.
Those three days were glorious, but it's nothing compared to what is coming. Remembering this helps me on the harder days so that I can move forward myself. It helps me enjoy where I am and truly be content. Knowing that God watches over those three and never leaves them brings my heart a sense of peace and calm I otherwise would not have. And then I can get on with the business of my own present, and enjoying where Capt and I are right now.
Yes, my house is emptier but my heart has never been so full.