If you don't have something nice to say....

I have been recuperating from last weekend. It was a GREAT weekend, but when I do too much I simply need to crawl in a hole to rest and recuperate for a bit. It's part of my introverted tendencies, and I'm learning to work with it rather than regret pushing it. Sometimes you simply have to say "no." Or at least, I'm learning I do.

I've tried to stay offline except for a few random connection moments as well. Let me tell you, as much as I love facebook and all it's connected loveliness sometimes it makes me wince and regret going online.

I just sort of want to throw this out here into the bright big blue internet sky. It's not that I think it will be read by many, but maybe it's my way getting it off of my chest. Should I just journal this? Maybe. But I don't think it would be the same release, and so here I go.

Friends, I need you to stop and consider why you write what you write on facebook. (OR any social area for that matter.) I have SO many friends across SO many lines so this is NOT written to ONE person in particular. No, sadly we all do this. But I want us to stop and think about it. When you write a status which states your opinion what is your purpose? If it's simply to have others jump on your bandwagon and agree with you, then you are working it like a champ. If you want to make other people consider your point of view and think, you are hitting a brick wall.

I know there is a difference between an opinion piece and a persuasive piece. I know that. But even within an opinion piece, even if you were debating someone on the other side of the argument, the way y'all are going about it is horrible. The condescension, the negative talk, the personal attacks, the half statements which only the inner circle seem to get.... all horrible communication techniques.

Here's the thing, there are MANY people out in the world like myself who want to hear from different sides. We want to know what you think AND why you think it. We may not agree with you, and you may not be trying to persuade us, but if you simply condemn us then you are setting another brick on the wall between us. Not only that, there are MANY people out in the world like myself who simply cannot take the barrage of your attacks. And we will be forced to hide you. And the truth of the matter is aside from those posts we really do like you and want to know what is going on in your life.

So, friends, do me a favor. Think before you share. Don't attack while stating your opinion. Let others disagree in love. And remember that the world we live in, real or virtual, needs more understanding and openness. We need less attacks and offense.

I would love for you to join the conversation through 
Facebook, Twitter, my email, or in the comment section.


  1. Ah, Stacey! I love this post. So well stated. I don't know that I always do it perfectly, but God is working in me to speak life giving words, not life taking. I am trying to evaluate the things that I say in this way.
    So, thank you. This was life giving. YOU are life giving and I am very thankful for your heart!

    1. I'm trying to do the same. I think we ALL slip occasionally, but it's the consistent behavior I want to be do better.

  2. I agree with Becky. The backspace key has become a closer friend lately, even though there are times when I neglect it that I shouldn't. I often find it's best for me to not comment at all, but take in what others are saying and just ponder. I have had to block people from my feed just because I could no longer take what they were dishing out on a regular basis. It wasn't necessarily attacking anyone, but so negative or entirely passive aggressive. I just don't ned those words filling my life. Thank you for boldly, yet kindly, speaking the truth here.

    1. Oh right! And my notebook journal is pure HEAVEN where I can vent and be sarcastic and even caustic just to get it out and work on changing the attitude. Thanks sweetie.


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