Convictions, Goals, Dreams. Individuality.

I sat on the couch turned sideways looking into his eyes as he shared with me. He talked about my heart, my giftings, and my leadings. I needed him to let me see everything through eyes which had not been altered.

You see, my goals, dreams, aspirations... they weren't mine anymore. Thoughts which belonged to others had slowly creeped in and settled down for a long winter's nap. They were good goals, inspiring people, and wonderful ideas, but I had tried to take ownership of them, and well, my friends they weren't mine to own. I couldn't see where I was supposed to be, because it felt as if I should be where everyone else was.

Yes, the one thing everyone says not to do, I did. But it didn't work. So I felt like a failure. My friends, as long as we are following someone else's path we will fail. I can't do the good works which God has made for another. I can't make someone's dream work in my life. And there are some truths about me which will not work for you.

My loving captain helped me refocus and go back to the basics of who I am. He helped me start over and reassess who I really want to be, and where I really feel called. He guided me back by listening, letting me talk, and sharing what he knows. I was grateful for him because he helped me hash and work and look forward.

I feel freer now that I have let go of the dreams which were meant for others. While I don't understand the truths for me, I have to admit I know they are there. And accepting them is so much better than trying to make the truths for another work, when they wont.

What truth are you using as a foundation which isn't yours to begin with?
Have you accepted your own truths yet?

Comments

  1. Wow, Stacey, great questions. I have accepted my truths, I think, and love them. I'm going to always write, regardless of the publishing outcome. Rejection (when in comes to publishing) is awful, but must be accepted and used to learn from. First and foremost, I'm a mom and wife, so my time isn't mine anymore. I have to subordinate myself despite a healthy resistance.
    As for truths that aren't mine ... I laugh to please others, even if their jokes or comments annoy or do nothing for me. I know I do it, and am working on changing that. Maybe instead of laughing I offer a smile, nothing more. Take it from there.
    Great post.

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    1. Sometimes it's hard to stop living by the rules of others. I know it was for me, and it has been a very long process. One I have to revisit again and again. I'm glad you are working at living by your truths. ((hugs))

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  2. I surely would love to hear what you learned. Tell me?

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    1. Ah... that might come in a private message. :)

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  3. I think I live on a tide of this. Sometimes I'm solid in what is right for me. And then sometimes I get caught up in what other people are doing and how I can make myself fit those things. I don't think that's always a bad thing necessarily. Sometimes I find things that ARE right for me in what someone else is doing, things I hadn't thought of before. But, like you, sometimes I find that I'm trying to force myself into a mold that just isn't me and I have to take a big step back and regroup.

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    1. And what you say does make sense. It's good to evaluate where we are and if it needs to change and soemtimes others do have fabuous ideas. But yes, regrouping for myself right now is what makes the most sense.

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