The Slump

I don't know if it's just me, but I'm thankful I am learning more about myself. You see, I just finished doing something that required me to be brave. It was a difficult step in the decision and the doing. I had to be brave all day long. In the end I learned more about myself, some weaknesses I have, and ways I need to improve. Before I even got home from the outing, I crashed. I slid into a little valley. It was of my own making, very possibly. I do not deny that. I have fallen there many times before , but didn't recognize it as such.

Before I would slide and then panic. My heart would beat fast, I would make rash decisions in the moment, and I would often times regret the actions taken at a later time. Then I fell into a period where I couldn't make any decisions because I wasn't sure whether I was in the valley or not. I was scared to decide and regret, so I made no decision which of course is a decision in itself. Now I'm able to see this cycle I fall into, and due to that I am able to make decisions better as well.

know yourself

I was big brave. As I slid into the valley the insecurities and feelings poured over me. I needed to stop trying. I didn't do very well. I was a faker. I was trying to hard to be something I wasn't. I needed to stop being brave because it simply wasn't my natural tendency. Stop it all.

The day after the big brave I had a down day planned. One with love and family and laughter. This could possibly have been the best decision I made in scheduling, though it wasn't totally my decision so I'm grateful it played out as it did. Through the day of recuperation I was able to find my normal again. The normal where I am aware of how much I have yet to learn, and also can admit how much I know. The normal where I realize being brave is sometimes a daily adventure, and I can't simply stop. The normal where I get up on the day after the day of recuperation and choose to do the brave things again.

I learned a lot about myself that weekend. I know I have a lot more to learn as well. I'm simply grateful that I can recognize the slump for what it is, and take the actions necessary to come out of it.

Have you begin to learn your own cycles? Do you know how you react to certain things and how to get through the reaction? Not everyone needs to be as brave as I do to do the things I do, but that doesn't mean you don't have to be brave. Does that bring you a high afterwards, or a low? Learn to embrace and understand yourself, because it will help you learn to embrace and understand others as well.

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