You sit there quietly. If you don’t say anything then no one will notice you. Your doubts flying. Your questions soaring. And they… they are all noticing their blessings.
How hard it is because you don’t want them to be in your situation. You want them to be happy and jubilant for all the things that have gone well in their week. You are happy for them, you are. But there is a little voice inside your head saying, “What about…. Me?”
It’s in this moment where you feel as if you don’t matter. Your prayers go unanswered and sometimes unnoticed. You have asked for others to pray, but it got lost in their “hallelujahs.” Trying to be positive you think maybe that’s the best way for them to get lost.
But you don’t want them lost. You want them seen. You want the prayers. You want the blessings, too. Why is it they get to “hallelujah” and you get to sit, quietly, so that no one notices.
Sometimes things don’t work out like we want. We’ve talked about that before. But when you are in the middle of waiting, looking in at the others celebrating, sometimes the easiest thing is to take a step further back towards the edge and sit quietly. I know.
But instead this is what I want you to do. Look around. There is someone else in your same situation. Reach out to them. Reach out to those celebrating and say, “Hallelujah” with them. Remind yourself if you are waiting for someone to reach out to you, then someone is waiting for you to reach out to them. Because none of us are alone, none of us are forgotten, and none of us are unimportant, but oh how it feels that way sometimes. And when we feel that way I can assure you no one wins.
Make your “hallelujah” be moving through the feelings. Make your “hallelujah” remembering that it will all work out in the end. Make your “hallelujah” be the fact you hold on tight to the truth God will never forget you. Make your “hallelujah” be loud and strong while you are on the edge, while you are waiting, while you reach out to someone else. Because the waiting is hard, but there is an end. Because we don’t always get what we want, but God is there. Because we don’t always feel him, but we can always know.
Hallelujah, my friend. Hallelujah.