The Purpose of Truth

I have been struggling. So many times I get an idea, I expound on it a little, and then I want to move on to the next thing. Or build on it before the foundation is set. I think that is what I have done with this topic. I feel as if I am ready to run and be free with this topic, but I know I'm not really ready. You see, like so many relationships in my life, I want my relationship with God to be instantaneously intimate. God brought this to my attention in this last week and I was stunned to realize how true that was. My first reaction was to say there was nothing wrong with it. But you see, there is.

If my relationship with God doesn't grow, then somewhere in me something is missing. If I miss those steps then the foundation isn't sure and true. Just like a relationship with a person, if I jump to step 10, steps 1-9 are going to trip me up.

What I want: to live a steadfast live with God.
What I have: a desire to learn scripture; a growing relationship with God.

What I have is good, and growing to what I want is better, but pretending I am already there serves no purpose to anyone. My goal of learning scripture has been one I have attempted time and time again, but I always got frustrated, and out of that grew the lie that I can't memorize scripture. I was basing that on the fact that I didn't know everything I needed to know instantaneously, and my frustration came because I saw the # of verses I knew as a goal. I forgot that it is a process; one that I grow with over time and one that is simply a step towards something even better. 

The goal of learning His Word simply moves me towards a closer relationship to God. Anything that keeps me from having that relationship with God is something that needs to be focused on, and God will show me what steps to take to clear the path between me and Him. But if I simply learn scripture to be more knowledgeable I have missed the mark completely.

I'll be honest, I'm not there yet, not like I want to be. I hope what I have said is true and right. Maybe I'm off. Maybe I am simply ignorant and naive. I have to believe that His Word has the power he says it does. I have to believe that it will make a difference in my mind, heart, and in our relationship. And so I take that first step towards a better relationship with God, by letting him show me the Truth which needs to be learned first.

Psalm 19:7-9
The law of the Lord is perfect, reviving the soul;
the testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple;
the precepts of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart;
the commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes;
the fear of the Lord is clean, enduring forever;
the rules of the Lord are true, and righteous altogether.

Comments

  1. I think you have a deeper desire to try than anyone I've ever met. I know you get frustrated because you feel like you're not "there yet"... but I earnestly earnestly believe that God will honor your desires, Stacey. This is always a process, a road we walk... And you're on it! and that's a good thing, and I firmly believe it's something that God will bless.

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